A question posed to serial killer Ed Kemper during a magazine interview...
"What do you think when you see a pretty girl walking down the street?"
His answer: "One side of me says, 'I'd like to talk to her, date her.' The other side of me says, 'I wonder how her head would look on a stick?' "

Kill me.... I'm watching Kathie Lee Gifford sing children's songs on the Rosie O'Donnell show... please kill me.

THANK YOU, CHRIS CARTER!!!!!!!

My long dark hair is now short dark hair.... and after I dye it burgundy-red this weekend, my transformation from Xena to Scully will be complete. THEN I WILL RULE THE WORLD!! BWAHAHAHAHA!!!! ahem....

Crackhead. :P

Twisted Physics 204 Final

Question 1: How how many rotations per minute will little Timmy have to spin in place to rip off his own arms? Assume Timmy's mass is 30 kilograms, 10 kg at three points (his torso and his two hands), that he is 1 meter tall, and that his arms immediately fall off if either the vertical or horizontal components of the force on them is greater than 5000 newtons.
Question 2: Assuming that Timmy's arms are at the top of his head (to simplify your calculations), how far away from Timmy will his arms land if he is standing at the top of a hill with a 5 degree incline?
Question 3: Assuming a coeffiecient of friction of .6 between Timmy's arms and the hill, how far will Timmy's arms slide before coming to a stop?

Show all work! Partial credit is possible!
You have 15 minutes. Good luck!

ROTFL!!
MAN MONKEY!

Please kill me. Guess what I must have lost last week? The magical floppy disk that goes everywhere with me... the one I store in my messenger bag, right next to my $100 calculator and my checkbook... the one that has my papers and homework from the last two semesters saved on it.... the one with all my new HTML code for my website on it.... and the one whose case not only stores a disk but also a sheet of paper with every single internet username (email, websites, school network logins, EVERYTHING) that I have, plus PASSWORDS on it. I am so so so fucked. I can't imagine how I lost it, though, since I am so neurotic about having it with me at all times. I know I had it last Monday, when I made a presentation to my computer class.... and I had it with me when I went to the computer lab to work on some HTML coding.... and I must have brought it home since I transferred the code onto my PC's hard drive... no school Tuesday... an exam wednesday, so I dont think I took the disk out... and Thursday I had a criminology exam so I don't think I was near a computer.... it's not at work or in any of the cars I was in last week... it's not in my bag or anywhere on my desk, or near my PC.... dear God, where IS it!?!? I'm going to fucking die if I don't find it soon.... gah... I hope my school is open this week so I can search the rooms that I may have left it in, or see if it found it's way to lost & found.... hell, even if I lost the disk, I just want my paper with my passwords on it... how odd to have lost the whole thing.... sigh... what am I going to do? Perhaps I shall kill myself.... motherfucker... ::SCREAMS::: HOW CAN THINGS POSSIBLY GET ANY WORSE? WILL I DIE NEXT?!? OH GOOD, I HOPE SO... BRING IT ON, DEATH, I DON'T FEAR YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! ::explodes::

Gary: sigh..my left nipple is suddenly extraordinarily itchy again
Jen: LOL... you know what that usually signifies, don't you?
Gary: I'm lactating? :P
Jen: extraordinarily itchy nipples usually means someone, somewhere in the world, is jerking off in your honor. :P
Gary: LOL
Gary: great
Gary: then someone's having a huge whack fest, cause it's been like this on and off for a day or two :P
Jen: LOL! maybe there's a huge orgy being held in your name, somewhere in germany or something.
Jen: "Heil mein Wagner Gary! HEIL MEIN WAGNER GARY!"
GGallivo: LOL!!!

LOL. I think I overdid it on the hair gel this morning. Every time I smile, I can feel my hair crack.

So here I am... so close to being done with the paper.... and I'm listening to "I'm Too Sexy" by Right Said Fred.... and I'm reaching the point where it won't be long now for unconsciousness to hit me.... because I think I just typed something to the effect of "Lynx is too sexy for Explorer, too sexy for Navigator..." ...I'm eating M&Ms and drinking coffee because I really needed to stay awake... but I dropped an M&M in the dust next to my computer.... I picked it up and then I ate it. I. ATE. THE. DUSTY. M&M!!! Not because I was hungry or I have an affinity for dust but because it was in my hand and the next place it should naturally go is into my mouth. I just realized that the sentence I just wrote could have some bad implications with those of you who have perverted minds. So let's pretend this never happened. Back to my paper.

so... sick... of writing... about... the Internet.... currently on page 10..... 2.75 pages to go.... losing steam.... please send money.... rtreijregg 46tu7536324093224t(*)EQ!K))K(*99745nfemere'ytjpokty835y535573509239%%E^877*(##%$@!ewrt54eJHGRIURTkooihOHIjnLKi..................................................................................................... ::dies::

HEY! That's my dog! :)

AWW :)

Jen: I would pay good money to see a threesome between scully, mulder, and doggett
Vic: lol.
Vic: "Agent Moooooulder!" he calls. "Don't walk away when I'm talking to you!"
Vic: yes! GAWD! that's so annoying!
Vic: moooooooulder :P
Jen: I sorta like it :P Alright, why am I turned on by the strangest things?
Vic: hehe
Jen: "yess!! 3 fbi agents going at it!"
Vic: yeah, well it's only cute until someone loses his eye
Jen: ROTFL.... you don't want to know the images in my head right now
Vic: ROTFL!... that was supposed to go with the comment about the accent... i hadn't even considered the next comment
Jen: LOL... wow... "uh, oh scully, oooh.... OW! OW! somebody get that eyeball before it rolls down a storm drain!"
Vic: ROTFL!

::curls up into a little ball and dies::

BTW, I tried getting a Site Meter on here, but to no avail. I think it may have something to do with the way Blogger works with JavaScript. :P