What do I do to ignore them behind me?
Do I follow my instincts blindly?
Do I hide my pride
From these bad dreams
And give in to sad thoughts that are maddening?
Do I
sit here and try to stand it?
Or do I
try to catch them red – handed?
Do I trust some and get fooled by phoniness,
Or do I trust nobody and live in loneliness?
Because I can’t hold on
when I’m stretched so thin
I make the right moves but I’m lost within
I put on my daily façade but then
I just end up getting hurt again
By myself
MYSELF!
I ask why, but in my mind
I find I can’t rely on myself
MYSELF!
I ask why, but in my mind
I find I can’t rely on myself
I can’t hold on
To what I want when I’m stretched so thin
It’s all too much to take in
I can’t hold on
To anything watching everything spin
With thoughts of failure sinking in
If I
Turn my back I’m defenseless
And to go blindly seems senseless
If I hide my pride and let it all go on
then they’ll
Take from me ‘till everything is gone
If I let them go I’ll be outdone
But if I try to catch them I’ll be outrun
If I’m killed by the questions like a cancer
Then I’ll be buried in the silence of the answer
by myself
MYSELF!
I ask why, but in my mind
I find I can’t rely on myself
MYSELF!
I ask why, but in my mind
I find I can’t rely on myself
I can’t hold on
To what I want when I’m stretched so thin
It’s all too much to take in
I can’t hold on
To anything watching everything spin
With thoughts of failure sinking in
How do you think
I’ve lost so much
I’m so afraid
I’m out of touch
How do you expect
I will know what to do
When all I know
Is what you tell me to
Don’t you
KNOW
I can’t tell you how to make it
GO
No matter what I do, how hard I
TRY
I can’t seem to convince myself
WHY
I’m stuck on the outside
Don’t you
KNOW
I can’t tell you how to make it
GO
No matter what I do, how hard I
TRY
I can’t seem to convince myself
WHY
I’m stuck on the outside
I can’t hold on
To what I want when I’m stretched so thin
It’s all too much to take in
I can’t hold on
To anything watching everything spin
With thoughts of failure sinking in
I can’t hold on
To what I want when I’m stretched so thin
It’s all too much to take in
I can’t hold on
To anything watching everything spin
With thoughts of failure sinking in

I am the pumpkin king.

Jen: "I'll never teeeeeeeeell" i fucking hate that
Gary: LOL
Jen: I hear it like every 10 minutes
Gary: All you do...is make up a fake number..get your daughter..then run before they find out..yeesh...
Gary: :P
Jen: "I'll never teeeeeeeeell" "I'll never teeeeeeeeell" "I'll never teeeeeeeeell" "I'll never teeeeeeeeell" "I'll never teeeeeeeeell"
Gary: LOL!!
Jen: ::beats head against table:: "I'll never teeeeeeeeell" "I'll never teeeeeeeeell" "I'll never teeeeeeeeell" "I'll never teeeeeeeeell" "I'll never teeeeeeeeell"
Gary: lol *puts a little pillow between you and the table*
Jen: LOL thanks

Vic: i'm soooooo boooooooooooored.
Gary: gather up a couple of kids in the computer lab, then play a big game of one potato two potato three potato four, college edition
Vic: how is that different from regular edition?
Gary: Lubricant is involved.

From an IM to my friend Jeff: "hehe. my friend gary and i used get schezwan every time my roommate would go home for the weekend. he'd end up getting good fortunes like "one of your friends will choke" and i'd get boring ones like "you will choke". then we'd stay up until six in the morning playing playstation games, cracking each other up, and suffering from indigestion. :-P"

Yo, listen up... here's a story... about a little guy that lives in a blue world... and all day and all night and everything he sees is just blue... like him... inside and outside...

Only on a man's show would burping a baby be equated with bleeding brakes.

My interpersonal communication class has been moved to a building on the north side of campus, about a 10 minute walk from the main buildings and also near the police academy (which trains at my college).... downside: walking uphill for 10 minutes with 50 pounds of books on my back... upside: cute cops and cadets galore.... now I'd like to interpersonally communicate with some of them... YUM.

jesus christ, I fucking hate the world. Fucking bastards... how can they do this? WTF?

We sit here and we see the stuff that goes on in other countries and we never imagine that it could happen here... and then it does...

It's frightening, and God, those poor people....

Like I told you at the fair, Gary, you have to learn the "Look once, then away!" technique. Say it with me... Once.. then away! Once.. then away! Otherwise, people think you care.

Hey, guys... If you look your left, you'll notice I've set the archive frequency to monthly instead of weekly. The gigantic list was starting to really irritate me.

PS "Bite it! Bite it like a little monkey!" :)

Jen: wow... I think I just heard screams coming from the woods behind my yard
Gary: maybe it was one of the crows attacking a human
Jen: a human casually strolling through the woods at 1am?
Gary: what..humans can't stroll through the woods?
Jen: at 1 am? in bumblefuck?
Gary: maybe it was an neanderthal lost and trying to find his cave
Jen: LOL
Jen: or maybe it was a prisoner escaping from one of the two state prisons or the mental hospital near me
Gary: hehe don't worry, he wants to be your friend....your very good friend
Jen: LOL shut up
Gary: LOL!!
Jen: >.<
Gary: hmm?
Jen: screams from the dark woods behind my house make me nervous
Gary: maybe it's a mutant deer trying to lure you out for a massacre
Jen: LOL
Jen: sure, I didnt WANT to sleep tonight

I think I speak for everyone, Gary, when I say WHAT THE FUCK.....

::sings to the tune of that Sting song:: "Penguin in a bot--tle..."

I had something all profound to share, but I don't remember it, so instead, i'll just put up this picture of everyone's favorite claymation penguin:

I hate the world.... This is proof why that's okay....

"When you woke up this morning, you knew that something was missing in your life. It wasn't the new car, the new job, the boyfriend or the girlfriend. But now you know: it's the Baby Jesus butt plug. Slap him on the dashboard. Use him as the ultimate pacifier. Or make Baby Jesus the centerpiece of your magnificent Dildo Creche.
What Would Jesus Do?